Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Stumped

One of the doctors today asked me a question which stumped me for a few seconds before I managed to come up with a reasonable answer. He only asked about my status.. whether I'm married or single, seeing a boyfriend or a girlfriend (ceh!) so it wasn't a rocket-science question. But it was his directness and sudden deviation, considering that we were just busy minding our own businesses prior to the questioning that took me off-guard.

Well, I hate the word 'divorce' and 'divorcee' so I'm always lost for words when I get these types of questions, what's more when I'm least expecting it. Anyway, most of the time my answer will be 'used to be married' which I think is much better and more sophisticated (hehe..) than the word 'divorced' but it will frequently, more than not, followed by a few seconds of silence before the other party start to apologise.. sometimes even profusely! Sometimes it pissed me off when they apologised because I wouldn't know whether they were just sorry for asking or were they sorry that I 'used to be married' in that pity kind of way? Either way, they don't have to apologise or feel sorry for me since I definitely do not need their pity! Thank god, the doc who asked today didnt apologised and instead merrily invited me to join his A+E social activities... a positive change indeed!

Monday, November 06, 2006

I'm back :)

Ramadhan has come and gone. Just like the past couple of years, the holy month never failed to bring significant life events, be it good or bad. I could not remember much of the first-half of the month, as I was too busy struggling to meet datelines after datelines, work and studies at the same time. Although I managed to squeeze in some gatherings in between, I also had to turn down some others, or just failed to turn up at the very last minute. Not very organised eh? Anyway, the second-half of the month, just like the previous years, brought me some unexpected turn of events.. Some made me closer to D, a person I’ve known for quite some time but only superficially previously due to probably my ‘I-don’t-want-to-get-hurt-again shield’ while a couple of other events, well, saddened me to the core, not to mention made me realised how vulnerable I was and still am.

Syawal, on the other hand, has so far brought only smiles. Was in JB for almost a week and as usual, was one of the key ‘tradition-keepers’ ensuring traditions from pelita to lemang are there although I stopped short at gathering the whole family for the usual all-in-one-shot photo-taking. To gather almost 50 young and old of varying degree of needs is too much hassle to be repeated each year! Syawal also brought the happiness of reunion with 2 long-lost friends and it was so good to see them after all these years. Although much has changed in our separate lives in the past few years, we cliqued again as soon as we met as if we’ve never been apart.. I’m so blessed to have good friends like them!

Had quite a number of friends over for raya on saturday. The fatigue from whole-night cooking with only assistance from my mom and an aunt was well worth it after seeing friends from different walk of life come together to celebrate the greatness of Aidilfitri and enjoyed the homemade food. D particularly loves my ayam tomato so much that he had it 4 times in a day! I have to admit that since the divorce, I hardly touch the stove, mainly because the act of cooking itself would remind me of the good old days.. ‘He’ used to enjoy my cooking very much and we frequently invited friends over for ‘makan-makan’ sessions particularly when we were in the UK but obviously, my cooking and the joy of sharing the greatness of food with friends could never compete with the freedom of singlehood that he desperately sought for. Oh well, that’s all the past now and I’m glad that I’ve found my cooking touch again!

Hope it’s not too late for this….selamat hari raya everyone and maaf zahir batin.

End of an era (and the beginning of a new one)

So, I turned 48 a few days ago. Instead of having the day off to celebrate, it was a busy day instead starting with a virtual viva session f...